I sold Brett’s bike to come to the Dominican..I didn’t have to, but wanted to. The bike was his passion, not mine. I wanted to use the money on something we both enjoyed together…taking a trip. This morning I’m feeling so many things..sorrow, happiness, rage..the list goes on. People say that it will get “easier” and I know now that’s not true. It’s something people say when they don’t know how to comfort you, they mean well, but they can’t even begin to imagine what it feels like to have a loved one end their life, like their child or spouse..a family member. Once upon a time knew what that felt like.. It’s a club no one wants to join and I’m having to build a new normal and a new happiness around that gaping hole inside of me. This trip is bittersweet, but I know it’s good for me. Miss you Brett, your death will never get easier, I’ll never get over it, but I will get through it. I wish you were here by my side, holding my hand on this beautiful beach this morning.
Published by abovetherug
After my husband ended his life I was completely devastated and felt as if I was torn into pieces that could never be put back together. How could life go on? The emotional pain he ended was unknowingly passed onto me. I knew I needed help quickly. I joined a support group called SASS (Suicide Awareness Survivor Support) who supports the ones left behind after a loved one's suicide and also helps raise mental health awareness. I will never get over my husband's death, but I now know that I can get through it, thanks to SASS. I sweep nothing under the rug. By starting an open and honest conversation I hope to help break down the stigmas and start raising mental health awareness. Together we can stay above the rug! View all posts by abovetherug